Of Cheese and corn

What happens when you put 20 intelligent students in the same room as a boring lecturer? Obviously no one will pay any attention. That's what happened in Accounts class last Tuesday (17 July). Everyone was trying to alleviate (check the dict if you dont know this word) their boredom by telling all the cheesy jokes or corny IQ (idiot quotient) questions they could think of. Here's a list:

Q: You are in a room with no exit or entrance. There are 5 running taps in the room. You will drown in 1 hour, but rescue will only come in 2 hours. You have a banana and a bar of soap. How do you save yourself?
A: Turn off the taps

Q: What's the difference between falling from the 2nd floor and falling from the 20th floor?
A: 2nd floor : *crash* *scream*
20th floor : * scream* *crash*

Q: Where on your body can you find both Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck?
A: This knee (Disney)

Q: There were 10 fish in an aquarium. 1 died. Why did the water level go up?
A: The other fish were crying.

Q: A man was tied to a tree in a forest full of tigers. His captors tied the other end of the rope to the ground, then put a candle there so that the candle would burn through the rope and cause the man's death. How will the man put out the candle? (He's too far away to spit, pee or whatever on the candle)
A: Sing 'Happy Birthday'. The tigers will blow out the candle.

Here come the REAL IQ questions (only 2 of them i'm afraid)

Q: You have 1 3 gallon container and 1 5 gallon container (with no measurement markings) and an unlimited amount of water. Using this equipment ONLY, how do you get 4 gallons of water
in 1 container?
A: 1. Put 3 gallons into the 5 gallon container (3+0=3). Then fill up the 3 gallon container. Pour
water from the 3 gallon container until the other container is full (3+2=5). There will be 1
gallon left in the 3 gallon container (3-2=1). Pour away the water in the 5 gallon container,
then pour the 1 gallon into the 5 gallon container. Fill up the 3 gallon container then pour
the 3 gallons into the 5 gallon container (1+3=4).
2. Fill the 5 gallon container. Pour water from there into the other container until it is full.
There will be 2 gallons left in the bigger container. Empty the 3 gallon container then pour
the 2 gallons into the 3 gallon container. Fill up the 5 gallon container. Pour water from the
5 gallon container into the other container until the 3 gallon container is full. Hence there
will be 4 gallons in the 5 gallon container.

Q: A knight had to send a message to someone on a mountain. The journey up takes 1 day without rest and the journey down takes the same amount of time. The knight left on a Friday and did not rest throughout the journey up and the journey down. How did he come down on Friday?
A: His horse's name was Friday.

Blue jokes coming up. This is the last section of this post. Feel free to stop reading now.


















Q: What is King Kong's favourite sport?
A: Ta Fei Kei (literally, hitting aeroplanes in cantonese, also slang for masturbation)

Q: A teenager had an affair with a middle-aged woman. They had sex one day. Why did the boy die the next day?
A: He drank expired milk.